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It connects me in a way that male-mode doesn't. In my upbringing and all- males didn't dance. Men had been stoic and awkward in that way-- that was a females domain. Something that I was presupposed to forgo. I sacrificed because the area of females. I walled them off. Worse than that - I grew to become accustomed and comfy NOT feeling things I ought to. At that same time, method down deep- I resented and hated women for not being able to express and have access to all that I am- and pleasures that fit with me, like dancing and music and emotions. Much more severely than that--- some of the ways that I innately think-- obtained walled off-- that I have to cope with my lifes problems, like vulnerability, sensitivity and keenness. Haha. It may be nuts, it may be widespread, whatever happened with me in my gender growth,, someway my emotions and passions got classed as femme- and walled off. Today, such as you, issues are altering.